"White Girl," "White Lady," "Whitey," "Snow Bunny," "Sexy," "White Gyal," These are some of the names (that I can understand) I am called on a daily basis. In addition to words, I am routinely stared at, looked up and down and made to feel uncomfortable by the opposite sex.
Harassment has been on my mind lately because of what is going on at home. While I didn't/don't get into the #metoo campaign, I fully support it and anyone who participates. I also support those who do not want to share their experience because WE DON'T OWE ANYONE ANYTHING. Think about this: Most women you know have had some sort of harassment in the workplace or in other parts of their life. Just let that sink in.
I have seen articles on the internet of what it is like being a women who runs; always looking behind you, always wondering if the man running towards you is going to grab you, turning the volume on your ear buds down low so you can still be aware of the noises around you. Did you also know that as women, we constantly wonder if we are going to be grabbed as we walk to our cars? Especially if we are parked in a garage. We also look under our car and in the back seat before we get in. And don't even think of handing us a drink we didn't pour ourselves or watch being poured. Etcetera, etcetera...
In Guyana, harassment is an every day occurrence. Just yesterday, as I was in the market where a man was trying to get my attention. He did so by calling me 'white girl.' I calmly explained he should not call me that because it is not nice, to which he responded, "I just wanted to get your attention, I don't know your name." I told him he can say "excuse me or miss." He then introduced himself to me and my friend who was with me, and asked us where our boyfriends are. This, is where we turned around and left. The vendors in the market know me. I am not normally bothered there, but every now and then it happens.
Same day but later, I am walking home from school. I passed some secondary students also walking (people walk really slowly here) and then heard, "white lady." I promptly turned around and explained it was inappropriate to say that and he should say "miss" if he wanted my attention.
This is daily life here.
On my walk to school (which I have been doing for over a year now) there is a house being built. This started a few weeks ago. What used to be a quiet, relaxing walk interrupted by a few good mornings on the way, suddenly became an uncomfortable and tense journey. The workers at the house constantly yelled at me. "Morning white girl, you looking sexy today." "Hey white gyal." When I tried to ignore them, they would continue with, "Hello....hello!" One day I finally had enough and decided to ask them to stop. I tried to explain it was not ok to talk to me like that, but they continued. I even yelled at them loudly enough two older gentlemen stopped to observe what was happening. Still, it continued. I did not want to have to change my route to school simply because these men did not know how to appropriately talk to someone. My beautiful friend Mel told me to talk to the man in charge so, the next day, I stopped and found that man. Explained what was going on and he profusely apologized, said he has talked to them, and will again. Since then, I have not had a problem. However, it is still uncomfortable walking by the construction site.
There was another time earlier in my placement when I was walking to the market and had to pass a group of workers. As I was passing one man stopped what he was doing to stare at me. When I got closer, proceeded to tell me how sexy I was. I told him to stop, said that was harassment and his response was "It's the truth! I'm just telling you the truth!"
Or how about when I ask someone to stop, their response is "Why?" I DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING!!!
I write all of this not to talk bad about or spread negative words about Guyana, but to say, yes, women are harassed on a daily basis. It does not always have to be sexual in nature. It can be a comment of "You should smile more." Or "Don't sit like that, it's not lady like." While in America, people are finally coming out and fighting back, here, most smile and seem to enjoy it.
I say most because I have observed some women fight back. They are small in numbers (from what I have observed) but they are doing it. I also try to instill in my students not to take harassment from others and to not harass others. Change begins with the young. Education is the key.
I have witnessed the men whisper in people's ears. It has also happened to me. It is one time where I am glad I cannot always understand their Creolese. While I don't normally let people get close enough to me to get into my ear, this happened at school. AT SCHOOL! In front of children. I immediately yelled at him and berated him, it is still the fact this happened to me in front of children. And my children at that. At a place that is protective of me and has accepted me as one of them.
Again, most women smile or ignore it, but I am not them. I was raised by a strong and independent mother and a father who 'gets it.' I was raised on the premise it is not ok for anyone to talk to me in this way. But here, it is accepted and some even like it.
Remember earlier when I said my friend and I were asked about our boyfriend's? Yeah...that happens a lot. It is very common for people to live with their parents until they are married, where our parents "kick" us out when we graduate high school. It is also common place for people to get married and start having kids at young ages. It is a foreign concept to most Guyanese that I am the age I am, I'm not married, and I don't have any kids. I am told all the time I need to find a Guyanese man (except my gyals Mal and Priya who say hell no). I'm also told I should get a kid of my own (especially after they see me playing with their children). Some of this is in jest, but not always. Then, there are the men. Most men here (again I say most) want to mansplain everything. They also ask inappropriate questions about our love lives. "You have a family?" "Why yes, I have two parents and two sisters as well as numerous extended family members." This is not what they mean about family. "Do you have a boyfriend?" "Why not?" "You need a Guyanese boyfriend." Yes, all of this has been said to me.To keep my sanity, I try to plan my trips out of the house to maximize my travel and I almost always walk with my earbuds. I know what you are thinking...that's not safe at all, but I assure you, I can still hear everything. I turn them down low so I can hear if someone is coming up behind me, or if someone is trying to get my attention. Sometimes they are not even on at all. It helps me to ignore the inappropriate and unwanted comments I get every time I leave the house. I can talk to and educate every person until I am blue in the face, but since I live in such a large and transient area, I cannot reach everyone. I have to pick my battles. Is it hard mentally? Absolutely. Do I loose my patience ever? Of Course! "Are there days I don't leave my house?" You betcha! But tomorrow is a new day and I have to keep looking forward to that.
There is so much more I could tell you about my time here and the harassment that follows but I don't want to give you the wrong idea about Guyana. Guyana is beautiful. It is the land of many waters. Yes, the coast is littered with trash and the ocean in murky and muddy, but if you look past that, you will see beautiful skies and trees. There are exotic birds you only see in a pet store flying around the sky. And the people. The people are generally kind. They are a tough bunch, but you would be too in this tropical heat with no a/c! Go even further to the interior and you will see untouched rainforest. Black water, families in canoes, monkeys jumping from tree to tree and luscious green landscapes or red desserts. Guyana has so much to offer if you look. 
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